I only want it to begin

So ... I've been doing this show, Blood Wedding. For those of you unfamiliar with Texas and UIL, etc .. it's our "University Interscholastic League One Act Play Competition" (aka UIL OAP) piece. UIL is just a big competition in Texas for everything from academics to athletics to art. Anyway, there are 5 rounds in UIL OAP (Zone, District, Area, Region, State) and after tonight, we have advanced to Area! (Basically, we've won either first or second place in two competitions.) At these competitions, I won individual awards as well. At Zone I won Honorable Mention All Star Cast (basically like Bronze) and tonight at District I won All Star Cast (like Silver). Oh, and I play "The Mother" by the way... if you are one of those people who actually read the Wikipedia article. haha. It's a good, intensive role. She's bitter, hurt, optimistic, protective, cynical, heartbroken, passionate, and loving. All at the same time. Ha. I have fun with it.

Me, AK, and Bethany in front of the awesome door Aledo made us for our dressing room.
Notice my awesome "skunk hair."

Blah. I don't know if all that typing and red tape explaining was worth the excitement ... but basically, we're going on to Area which is farther than any of us in the cast has ever been and we're really excited!

I have especially enjoyed the conversations I've fallen into on both the bus rides home these past two competitions. Sam and Garrett are awesome people and I'm glad we've become friends this year. I've like ... known them for a while, but I just never really talked to them, like REALLY talked to them until this year. Don't know why I never made the effort, but whatever, I'm glad I got to get to know them before we all move away in August. Cool people. Good conversation -- that's refreshing.

Oh, and also I had a conversation with Nick in BCIS yesterday, and then tonight on the bus Garrett and Sam and I had a similar conversation, all about how sometimes a nice, easy, casual pleasant relationship can be really comforting. Like, maybe not every relationship has to be a potential "forever" thing. And maybe, if it grows into that -- cool. But most of the time, it won't and that's okay too. I said that life is just all about experiencing things, including experiencing people. I believe it is possible to be in a relationship and let it run its course and then let it end when it's time to move on because of timing, or growth, or just because that chapter is over. And hopefully, if the relationship didn't turn bitter or someone didn't get hurt, maybe both parties can just walk away from the experience and look fondly on it. You can still care about a person even if the way in which you care about them is different today then it was the day before. See: High Fidelity. It's a good film, I think it sort of touches on that subject.

Anyhow, driving home tonight I put this on my ipod, Begin by Ben Lee. It's fitting with the theme.

Begin by Ben Lee

I'm walking down Broadway
Each foot step is a new love letter
I'm trying to make eye contact
With each and every stranger that I pass
Thinking about the city
It's living proof people need to be together
I'm thinking about how I just want to open up
And give and give and give
And it's ok for you to care
Cause I can feel you in the air
And while you wonder "how's this gonna end?"
I only want it to begin

I'm thinking about desire
I've had to learn how to sin successfully
I'm thinking about bliss
And bliss is all dressed up
And there's no one to dance with
Remembering her smile and the nuclear bomb
And the reasons I loved her
Walking through Central Park
I'm in a foriegn country and I'm waiting for a sign
That it's ok for you to care
Cause I'm not going anywhere
And while you wonder if you should let me in
I only want it to begin

I'm still singing
Twisting new melodies, breaking arrangements
Thinking about my heart
I guess you've heard, sometimes it's heavy
But I just keep moving
When I hit a wall, I look up at the sky
I'm thinking about my maker
In spite of all this I know she won't give up on me
And its ok for you to care
Cause I can taste you everywhere
While it's true
All straight things must bend
I only want it to begin