I can't believe school starts on Monday. This summer went by too quickly; I think I worked too much instead of enjoying myself. I understand how that could sound hedonistic, but really I wish I had spent more time with my closest friends and especially my sister. Time is just too precious to wear red and khaki under linoleum lights. Today we cleaned the theatre room, barely scratched the surface ... still more to do. We're going back tomorrow to finish up. I love being in the theatre and being around theatre people. I don't always agree with or love all of them all the time, but there is a certain comfort that comes from being around familiar faces from the last four years.
Juan and I have become such amazing friends lately. We hardly talked for the first two months of summer, but it was like we had never been apart the way we can just jump right back to where we left off. He's amazing. I'm glad he's my friend.
I miss Brooke so much. She says she'll be back in December, but I really can't help but worry about her in Seattle bouncing from house to house. She got her phone shut off, so that's just worse and I hope she is staying in school and getting good grades. However, in her letter she did seem relatively happy so I hope that means things are going well for her. I just wish she was here.
Steve. Geez. I don't know what to say. You bother me that way you are so codependent on whoever your latest boyfriend is. I will never see the desperate need for a boy in the way you act. I want a companion to accent my life and add to it. Not complete it. I just don't understand how you can be my best friend sometimes. You're no good at listening or being there for people, only when I can corner you into actually hanging around me do I ever get to talk to you. I'm going to stop ranting about you right now. It'd take too long and make me too unhappy. You just got lost, I swear. Maybe the next generation? Ha. We'll see ...
There are so many things I want to do or become. I want to be a writer, an actor, a filmmaker, a poet, a songwriter, a pianist, a rockstar, a revolutionary, an activist, a craftsman, a fashionista. Sometimes I feel very ordinary and untalented and that's the most troublesome feeling at all.
Dayna and I saw "Vicky Christina Barcelona" on our last night together, and it was pretty awesome. I felt like all the characters were based in reality, and it was nice to see strong yet flawed feminine protagonists who weren't perfect or stereotypical. I could relate with Vicky's shrew-like demeanor towards the opposite sex and calculating drive and focus on "logical" decisions, but I could also relate with Christina's constant dissatisfaction with her personal life, creative ventures, and the burning desire to find something with which to express herself fully, and never feeling really adequate at any of her attempts.
Scarlett Johansson is beautiful and such an inspiration. Girls who are not rail thin can still make it in Hollywood and make wonderful, classy, thought-provoking movies without being cast as the "fat friend".
Hmm ... I just got distracted by IMDB and looking up Scarlett and Woody Allen. Ha. I'm so freaking tired. Yes ... so, I'm rather tired and I still need to clean my room and take a shower before I can go to sleep and go clean the theatre room some more. So, I leave you with a darling picture of Juan and I chatting by the pool. =]
[Title from John Lennon's "Beautiful Boy"]
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